Are
you considering having just one child? Find out why single-child
families are growing in number, and discover if this choice might be
right for you.
Heidi
Dean has one child, a son, Cade. Now three years old, this little boy
is just enough for Heidi and her husband, Roy. The couple does not need
to have a daughter for themselves or have another baby so that Cade
will have a sibling. They’ve been blessed with one. And they’re done.
“Knowing
our personalities, we just didn’t have enough of ourselves to spread
out among multiple children,” says Dean, co-host of BabyZone’s Single Child Families
board. “We wanted a child and knew we had enough to give to one, but
felt that there’s a lot of pressure for us to have another. We felt
like if we gave in to that pressure, we would be cheating not only
ourselves, but the baby we are bringing into the world.”
By
having only one child, the Deans of Bellevue, Washington, will be
regaining some of their independence sooner than if they decided to
have more children. All of their attention can go to Cade, and they
will make sure he has all the experiences they want for him. The family
is already planning a trip to Disneyland for when Cade is five,
something they wouldn’t do if another baby were in the picture.
“In
surveying our finances, we could just have the one [child] financially
and still give him the experience we want to give him,” Heidi explains.
“I can be a stay-at-home mom and not always be scraping for money.”
The Single-Child Family The
Deans are among a growing number of families that are choosing to have
single-child families. The US Census Bureau reports that in 1976, only
nine percent of women had just one child. By 2002, that number had
nearly doubled to 17.4 percent.
There
are many reasons behind the single-child phenomenon. Dr. Susan Newman,
a New Jersey-based social psychologist and author of Parenting an Only Child,
says the high divorce rate, secondary infertility, women starting their
families later in life, and the rise of the two-income family all play
a role. “I think it’s just as hard to decide to have the second,” says
Dr. Newman. “You’re faced with a whole different set of issues.” Having
enough space in your house, enough financial resources both for food,
clothing, and daycare now and college later on, and simple scheduling
issues all come into play when thinking about another child. And if
both parents work, how will they juggle the responsibility of another
child?
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